Identity is something I think we struggle with now more than ever. In this world, we can use so many different things to front who we are. We have plastic cards called our ID, and so many emails and numbers to identify us, and there's also the things we do or want to be that become us.
We can build our whole character out of the things we like; that's part of what makes the middle school experience so painful. At such a young age we are changing and figuring it all out, and we are constantly shifting. Even when we grow up, we still change and find new things to do, new things to like, new things to be, new people to be with. So how do we know who we are? How can we be anything but a thought in the wind?
There is an increasing focus on the self in today's culture. Self-care, self-love, I read a post recently that said when you're unsure of everything else just keep searching for yourself and that will make you happy. The point to this is that identity is important, and I think with the rising self-focused culture, it's the thing we are searching for to make us happy. With all the controversy around gender, marriage, child raising, political parties, mental health, etc. you name it, I think everyone is just searching for their own identity and a place to belong. I think we are just lost. Identity is the essence of who we are, and we all want to find the place we feel at home. (Someday on this blog we will explore the idea of home and our place in the world, as well as the self-care movement, but let's stay on identity today.)
I've found in my life that the only unchanging thing is not me, it's God. He is forever, and He is the only thing I can base my identity in to have a solid foundation in my life. To have anything else makes our life harder than it needs to be. It leads to crisis, and sometimes it's a crisis of our own making. For instance, sometimes people with trauma begin to engrain that into who they are. They make their whole life about this pain and it bleeds into everything. They start saying things like "I'm terrible" or "I don't deserve to be happy" or "I'm a bad person" and it becomes self-fulfilling. Then it becomes such a part of a person that it's too hard to get healthy. You also see this struggle when people make their identities about someone else like their spouse or their kids. If something happens to this other person or the relationship, then you feel like your whole world is falling apart because you no longer have a self. And it isn't just these two things, it's anything that we put our identity and trust in other than God. This is what idolatry means. It sounds like a scary old biblical word, but it just means that the things we put first in our lives should always come second to God. He is the one who fills us up. When we acknowledge our identity as His children, we can finally rest in truth without striving for something that isn't ours to carry.
The fact that we are His children, made in the image of God, means that we have inherent dignity. (And just to clarify what I mean by that: according to Wiki, dignity is the right of a person to be valued and respected for their own sake, and to be treated ethically.) If we didn’t have this going for us, we would essentially be no different from a monkey.
We are more than just complex animals, we are more than our looks or occupation. We are more than what people say about us. We are not a card with a number on it, nor are we summed up by being a mother or father or lawyer, etc. We are who God says we are. He calls us His, He calls us beloved, He knit each one of us together and knows the exact number of hairs on our heads. Honestly, where else would you want to find your identity other than a Father who knows you so much better than you know yourself and still loves you? He sees the best in us, and He also sees our worst and doesn't turn away. Why look for anything else in the world to affirm you? Nothing can beat the way He sees us.
We are children of God and we can be confident in Him and rest in Him. Seek validation from Him only and know that nothing else matters.
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